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Like I said; the guitar jokes are gonna be brutal, so enjoy
this while it lasts! Tons of jokes at DrumJokes.com

Cool Stuff for Guitar Players

 • What's the difference between a drummer and a bag of garbage? The garbage gets taken out at least once a week.

 • Why did the drummer have 10 kids? He sucked at the rhythm method.

 • How does a drummer count in seven? One, two, three, four, five, six, sev, ven

 • Why are band jokes so short? So drummers can remember them.

 • What do you call the part of the show when the audience goes to the restroom? The drum solo

 • Did you hear about the drummer who went to Harvard? Me neither.

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 • Why is a drum machine better than a drummer? Because a drum machine can keep good time and it won't sleep with your girlfriend.

How To Piss People Off

 • Did you hear about the drummer that got an AM radio? It took him a month to figure out he could also play it at night.

Drum Chat Forum

 • Why did the drummer move to L.A.? Because it was easier to spell.

 • What do you call a drummer with lots of money? Married

 • What do you call a smart drummer? A piano player

 • What do you do if you run over a drummer by accident? Back up

 • How do you know if there's a drummer walking behind you? You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.

 • Did you hear about the drum machine that was so much like a real drummer? Yea, it even showed up late to the gig!

 • What's the one thing drummers say that really gets them laughing? Hey, why don't we try one of my songs!

 • Oh man, said the frustrated band leader, "So many drummers, so little time."

 • A guitar player and a drummer were walking through a park one day. The guitar player said, "Hey look at that dog with one eye!" The drummer covers one eye and says, "Where?"

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 • How do you get a drummer to stop biting his nails? Make him wear shoes.

 • How do you keep a drummer busy all day? Give him a piece of paper that has "please turn over" written on both sides.

 • What do 6 drummers at the bottom of the sea sound like? A good idea.

 • How do you save a drummer from drowning?
Take your foot off their head.

 • What do you call a drummer with half a brain?

 • What do you call a rock drummer who knows how to play jazz and doesn't? A gentleman.


This "Drummer is at the Wrong Gig" video is legendary.
Check out one of the most animated drummers in history!



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 • What did the drummer name his watch dog? Timex

What can strike a drummer without him even knowing it? A thought.

How do you make a drummer laugh on Saturday? Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

Why did the drummer shoot the clock? To kill some time.

How do you keep a drummer busy all day? Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner.

What does a drummer say when you ask him if his blinker is on? It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off...

What do you call 5 drummers at the bottom of a pool? Air bubbles.

What do you call a drummer between two other musicians? A mental block.

What do you call a musician with only 2 brain cells? A drummer.

Why can't drummers make ice cubes? They always forget the recipe.

Why are musician jokes so short? So drummers can remember them.

Why is it good to have a drummer as a passenger? So you can park in the handicapped zone.

How can you tell if a drummer's been at your computer? There's white out on the screen.

What do you call a drummer with a briefcase in a tree? Branch manager.

What job does a drummer have in a M&M factory? Proofreader.

How do you get a one-armed drummer out of a tree? Wave to him.

How do you confuse a drummer? Tell him you've changed the time signature from 4/4 to common time.

Why don't drummers ever call 911 during an emergency? They can't remember the number.

Did you hear about the drummer that took an hour to cook minute rice?

What do you call a drummer wearing a leather jacket on stage? Rebel without a clue.

My neighbor knocked on my door at 3 am in the morning. 3 am, can you believe this? Lucky for him I was awake playing my drums.

^^ Alright, this is just mean! ^^

In case we forget, we just wanted to thank everyone for visiting our site and sharing it with your friends. It's been quite fun working with DrumJokes.com over the years and providing a healthy laugh for everyone. A special thanks to all drummers out there in the world that understand that it's healthy to laugh at ourselves. - All in good fun!

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